HANDOUT 1: CONCISION PRACTICE

boingcadgeMechanics

Nov 18, 2013 (3 years and 4 months ago)

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HANDOUT 1: CONCISION

PRACTICE


Directions:

Revise these sentences to state their meaning in fewer words. Avoid passive
voice, needless repetition, and wordy phrases and clauses.
If there is more than one
sentence, combine them into one concise sentence by
deleting repetition and unnecessary
phrases.
The first
two
sentence
s have been revised as

example
s
.

Example
:
There are many farmers in the area who are planning to attend the meeting which is
scheduled for next Friday
.


Many
local

farmers plan t
o attend next Friday's meeting.


Example
:
Their car is fuelled up. It is ready for the long drive. The drive will take all night.

Their car is fuelled up for the all
-
night drive.
(The
sentence

discussing the “long drive” is redundant


an

all night drive

is clearly a long one.)


1.
Although Bradley Hall is regularly populated by businessmen, close study of the building
as a structure is seldom undertaken by them.



2
. It is expected that the new schedule will be announced by the bus company within the
nex
t few days.



3
. It is very unusual to find someone who has never told a deliberate lie on purpose.



4

A downtown rally was attended by more than a thousand protesters. Five protesters
were arrested by police for disorderly conduct.



5
. The subjects that

are considered most important by elected officials are those that have
been shown to be useful to them in re
-
election campaigns.



6
. In our company there are wide
-
open opportunities for professional growth with a
company that enjoys an enviable record fo
r stability in the dynamic atmosphere of
aerospace technology.




7
. Some people believe in capital punishment, while other people are against it; there are
many opinions on this subject.



8
. The cliff dropped to reefs seventy
-
five feet below. The reefs be
low the steep cliff were
barely visible through the fog.



9. Sometimes John went running with Sarah. She was a good athlete. She was on the
track team at school.



10. Government leaders like to mention the creation of new jobs. They claim that these
new
jobs indicate a strong economy.