Memoirs: Snapshots

kissimmeemisologistΒιοτεχνολογία

14 Δεκ 2012 (πριν από 4 χρόνια και 8 μήνες)

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SNAPSHOTS!

Snapshot Example

Like taking a picture, describe what you see when you look at a person, place, or thing.

“My Uncle Gary, the auto mechanic, stood leaning against his yellow GTO. He was
wearing an Eagles sweatshirt and blue jeans, and he had one ankle crossed over the
other.”

Then, ZOOM IN, just like you do with a camera, on some part of the picture you’ve already
painted.

“The arms of the sweatshirt were pushed up toward his elbows, and his arms were bare
as he crossed them in front of him. Uncle Gary had pushed his sunglasses up onto the
top of his head.”

ZOOM IN one more time, trying to capture something special about him.

“To keep the sun from his eyes, he had his chin tilted back. ‘How’s my favorite niece?”,
he asked, squinting and smiling at me all at the same time.”

If you can, ZOOM IN one more time
.

“When I ran to give him a hug, he swooped me up and twirled me around. He smelled
like fresh air, and he gave me a little tickle before letting me sit on the hood of the car like
the Dukes of
Hazard
.”


No Zoom


My brother loves to
snowboard.


And…? So what?

Zoom magnification: x2


As my brother glides down the
mountain, hearing the roaring of the
snow
-
making machines, he squints
at the sun reflecting off the slope
and smiles. There is no place he’d
rather be!




Zoom magnification: x3


As my brother glides down the
mountain, hearing the roaring of the
snow
-
making machines, he squints
at the sun reflecting off the slope
and smiles. There is no place he’d
rather be!

Swerving down the Black
Diamond on his M3 Hybrid, he moves
easily in his black Stryder jacket and
gray Columbia snow pants.


Zoom magnification: x4


As my brother glides down the mountain,
hearing the roaring of the snow
-
making
machines, he squints at the sun reflecting
off the slope and smiles. There is no place
he’d rather be! Swerving down the Black
Diamond on his M3 Hybrid, he moves
easily in his black
Stryder

jacket and gray
Columbia snow pants. The white snow
sprays under the pressure of his board as
he picks up speed.



Zoom magnification: x5


As my brother glides down the mountain,
hearing the roaring of the snow
-
making
machines, he squints at the sun reflecting
off the slope and smiles. There is no place
he’d rather be! Swerving down the Black
Diamond on his M3 Hybrid, he moves
easily in his black
Stryder

jacket and gray
Columbia snow pants. The white snow
sprays under the pressure of his board as
he picks up speed. The corners of his
mouth turn up slightly as he zooms past
the line of blurred trees, while the sharp
wind bites at his quickly reddening
cheeks.



No Zoom

Zoom x2

Zoom x3

Zoom x4

Zoom x5

Bold Beginnings


One sunny day I went to the beach and saw a
mermaid.


BORING!

Action Beginning


I dove into the ocean, kicked my feet in the cool
water, stood up, and wiped the water from my face.
I paused. Something strange near the rocks caught
my eye.

Dialogue Beginning


“What a great day for the beach!” I yelled as I
splashed in the waves.

A thought, question, or
feeling beginning


If only I could swim out to that sandbar, I thought.
There’s something very strange out there. Something
I’ve never seen here at the beach before.

A sound effect beginning


Kersplash! The waves crashed over me as I stood
staring at the strange sight out on the jetty.

Examples and
Practice


Read the “What is it?” and example on your
“Explode the Moment” handout.



Complete the “Your Time to Write” section in your
Writers NB.

S
h
r
i
n
k
i
n
g

Time

Shrink a Moment
When:


It helps move the story along.


Saying less is saying more.


It makes a greater impact to condense.

Examples and
Practice


Read the example on your “Shrinking Time”
handout.



Then, complete the “Your Time to Write” section in
your writer’s NB (for homework if not complete).
Share with a partner.

“Genetic Engineering” &

“Let it Snow” by David Sedaris

While reading:


Look for and make note of examples of:

1.

Time Jumps (shrinking time)

2.
Exploding the moment

3.
Vivid Verbs

4.
Sensory detail/imagery

5.
Dialogue